April 24, 2023
“Healing takes time, and asking for help is a courageous step.”
– Mariska Hargitay
A friend reached out to Father Ken after Mass and told him about an elderly man whose life was unraveling after his wife died. It seemed, she said, that he had lost the will to live.
Father agreed to see him and a week later visited him at home, where he was watching TV. He explained that his wife died and now he was alone…and he couldn’t deal with it. He missed her presence. He missed their time together. He missed watching their favorite shows together. He missed her housekeeping. He missed her cooking. He even missed their arguments. And he was sure he’d never get over it.
During his 60 years as a priest, Father had seen the effect that grief can have on people. Mourning is a part of life no one escapes.
Father urged the man to reach out to a bereavement group in a nearby parish. He already had, but said everyone was smiling, so he didn’t return because he was in no mood for smiling.
Father was at an impasse. They talked awhile and he said he would return in a few weeks. The man went back to watching his television programs, which offered the only stability he had left.
Help is available for those who grieve. No matter how strong you think you are, you shouldn’t do it alone.
Sister Mauryeen O’Brien, OP, author of “The New Day Journal: A Journey from Grief to Healing,” says: “What can help us navigate our grief journey? There are innumerable therapists, support groups, books, movies, music and lectures available. There are experienced church personnel, family, and friends who are willing to listen to and support us as we try to make some sense of what has happened. We should make use of as many of these resources as are helpful.”
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Catholic Cemeteries of the Diocese of Bridgeport offers support. Reach out.