April 1, 2023
“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We sometimes grow in one dimension, and not in another, unevenly. We grow partially.”
– Anais Nin
Can you tell where you are on your grief journey? Most likely not. Sometimes it’s difficult because just when you think you’re taking a step forward, you find yourself taking two steps back. But the curious thing — and it’s almost Zen-like — is that when you are taking those two steps back, you are actually moving forward.
The healing journey does not progress in a straight line from point A to point B, although for many years, counselors believed it was so. Now, we know that grief is unique and grief is personal, and no two people will have the same experience, even though their larger understanding will be the same.
You may ask, “How do I know if I’m making progress?” One of the easiest ways, which is a practice that everyone who has suffered a loss should do, is to keep a journal. It may seem like you’re chronicling an emotional roller coaster ride. But in your writing, you will find evidence of growth on your journey to healing. The signs may be almost imperceptible at first. However, if you pay attention, you will be able to detect them. You’ll be surprised with what you uncover when you least expect it.
Equally important, recognizing these “signs of progress” will help you embrace a wonderful spiritual virtue called hope. Hope for yourself and hope for the future.
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You may not realize where you are on your healing journey, but you are making progress.