The Healing Journey

January 25, 2026

Look Up

By Paul E. Tupper

Have you ever gotten into one of those proverbial “funks?” I’m guessing we’ve all had them. We keep looking back on something we either did or did not do, and we can’t stop thinking about it.

I had one such experience several years ago, and I still think about it. It involved my late wife, Jean. It surfaced again on our wedding anniversary. It was a warm night in June of 2019. Jean was battling an insidious disease. She never gave up, and she never lost her positive spirit. As we were going to bed, Jean asked me if I would go downstairs and get her some fresh watermelon for a little late-night snack. It was a really minor request, but it was late, and I had set my alarm for 4:30 a.m. because of an early meeting in New York City.

Instead of going to get it as she would have done for me, I responded “It’s late, and I’m tired. Can’t you wait until breakfast?” Of course, Jean was fine with that. She never complained. As it turned out, Jean’s health took a very significant downturn just a few days later, and I never got the chance to give her the watermelon. The memory haunted me for months afterward and still pops into my head occasionally.

I didn’t act like a Christian that night. And, while I’m sure that God wasn’t happy with me, He also would not have wanted me to keep looking back. He wants us to learn from our mistakes but not obsess over them.

We often hear the phrase “seek His face.” With every passing day, I’m growing to love that phrase more and more. It conjures up a beautiful image. It evokes a feeling of peace. How can we not feel serene and calm when we’re thinking of Jesus? Those are all good things. But, seeking the face of Jesus gives us even more.

It compels us to look forward, not backward. It prompts us to look up, not down. We would never look down in search of God. We always look up for God. After all, God is in Heaven, and like little kids, we tend to look up when we’re seeking Heaven. And, by looking forward – to Jesus – our outlook is transformed. Instead of wallowing in the past, we pull ourselves up and move forward. Our hope is restored, and that changes everything.

It was difficult for me to look forward in the months after Jean passed. I simply couldn’t get out of my funk. But, Jesus never left me, and He pulled me toward Him. Today, when that memory came back, I was sad for a moment, but then I remembered to seek His face. When I did, He changed my channel. I was reoriented, looking forward.

Seek His face and never abandon hope — hope in Jesus.

(Paul E. Tupper of Milford is author of “Perfect Moments With God,” which is available on Amazon. He grew up in Greenwich. His father Paul was a deacon in the Diocese of Bridgeport, and his mother Aurora was the Director of Religious Education in their parish. Most of his career was with a major public accounting firm in New York City. In response to a call from God, he began writing spiritual reflections.)

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