The Healing Journey

September 3, 2023

Your healing journey often requires forgiveness, and sometimes it seems there are many people to forgive, starting with yourself. You may blame yourself in some small way for the death of your loved one. You may believe you should have done better or that you did something you shouldn’t have. The possibilities are endless.

You may also find yourself needing forgiveness if you were unfaithful or weren’t the person you should have been. Then, you may find that you have to forgive the person who died, either because they were unfaithful or didn’t do all they could have to stay healthy. And there’s always the possibility you did not like the person who died and now you’re shackled with guilt.

For years Julie and Carol didn’t talk, and no one could even remember what precipitated the feud but that didn’t matter. If Carol was invited to a dinner party and Julie was too, she wouldn’t go. And vice versa. Maintaining that level of resentment requires a lot of work. Unfortunately, it’s self-destructive.

When Julie died, Carol didn’t go to her wake. She clung to her animosity right until the end. She still was convinced she was right and Julie was wrong.

Carrying grudges to the grave takes its toll emotionally and spiritually. Of course, forgiving a decades-long resentment is no easy feat. It requires more than saying, “I forgive you.” Most of the time, we don’t have the ability to say “I forgive you” or “Forgive me.”

That’s where God comes in. Without God, there is no true forgiveness because true forgiveness requires grace. And all you have to do is ask for the grace, and it will be given to you. God will lead you where you need to go … once you ask for help.

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Always pray: Give me the grace to accept forgiveness and to forgive others.