April 3, 2023
“People who perform random acts of kindness do not always realize how much of an impact they are having on another individual.”
– Amit Kumar
There are dark days when you’re grieving, but they will be brightened from time to time. Because you are grieving does not mean you can’t find relief in some small corner of your life.
During these lonely times, there is an antidote … and the antidote is kindness toward someone else or a special person in your life. That person might just be you. Many of us have difficulty doing something for ourselves because we’ve been brought up to believe it’s selfish or frivolous. As a result, we — especially those of us who are parents — do everything for others.
When Carolyn Killian, Director of Bereavement for Catholic Cemeteries of the Diocese of Bridgeport, facilitates sessions on bereavement, one of the favorite action points is: “Think of what you would like to have someone do for you, then do it for yourself.”
Studies have shown that an act of kindness has enormous benefits for the person performing the act, as much as for the recipient. Those who are grieving need those acts as much as we need to perform them on our healing journey.
A story by Catherine Pearson in the New York Times told about the grief of Erin Alexander of California, who was weeping one afternoon because her sister-in-law died. She went into Starbucks for coffee, and the barista was stressed out because the coffee machine broke down. Erin “told her to hang in there.” When she got her coffee, she noticed a message on the cup that said, “Erin, your soul is golden.”
“I’m not sure I even necessarily know what ‘your soul is golden means,’” she told the reporter, but “That little thing made the rest of my day.”
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Simple acts of kindness help you and help another person in ways you can’t imagine.